Black Love
Today, February 14, is Valentine’s Day. For today, and today only, I am going to depart from my practice of commemorating a historic event or birthday that took place on this date. Instead, I have decided to celebrate Black Love. Dr. Dianne M. Stewart, a Connecticut native, actually teaches a course on “Black Love”! She recently published a book on the subject: Black Women, Black Love: America’s War on African American Marriage.
Black love is remarkable! Consider that just over 150 years ago, it was illegal for the majority of Blacks in America to even marry. Still, under those harsh and inhumane conditions Black people developed, nurtured and sustained loving, familial ties and bounds.
Black love is improbable! It has been institutionally and structurally discouraged through laws and public policies for over a century. It is not an accident that according to the most recent Census Bureau, nearly 3 out of 4 Black women in America were not married.
Black love is unstoppable! Despite these dismal facts, Black love survives. Consider Michelle and Barack Obama. Consider Denzel and Pauletta Washington. Consider Colin and Alma Powell.
Consider, too, the fictional depictions of Black love by Shonda Rhimes or Beverly Jenkins, the author of romance novels that focus on African American life in the 19th century. Black Romance writers Alyssa Cole, Talia Herbert, Terry McMillan, Alisha Rai and so many others remind us through their fictional work that Black people are romantic, Black people are lovers and Black people are gracious in their perpetuation and dissemination of love.
Black love endures! The foundation upon which our country was built includes the stones that were placed through the expression of Black love!
I have been nurtured and sustained by Black love personally. Fortunately, we continue to live among the legacy of Black love. Today I salute those examples of Black love.*
My grandparents, now deceased, George and Mamie Glenn Garrett, who were happily married for close to 70 years;
My parents Prof. Charles (now deceased) and Dr. Ann Robinson, who were married for 50 years;
My Pastor and his wife – Dr. Frederick and Mrs. Annette Streets who have been married for close to one-half a century;
My role models Mr. and Mrs. Marcus and Marguerite McCraven, who have been married for 74 years;
My second parents Atty/Prof Hugh and Marilyn Price who have been married for close to 60 years;
My mentors/ older siblings Prof. Stephen and Atty Enola Aird Carter, Drs. John and Gloria Gaston and Drs. Gary and Debbie Desir who have been married for several decades.
This is a participatory entry. Therefore, I invite you to share in the comment section examples of and inspirations for Black Love that have touched your life.
Happy Valentines day!
*Of course, marriage is not the only expression of enduring love, nor is marriage between heterosexual couples. Still, I want to shout out those among us who have chosen and persisted in following that path of matrimony, even as I note, with sadness and regret, that this list does not include my homosexual brothers and sisters, who were not afforded the legal right to marry until recently. Their omission from this list, in no way diminishes the truth and depth of their Black love, or my admiration of it.